Hi all.... Seeing as I have a bit more free time on my hands, I thought I'd attempt to post a few blogs about all the GD exciting things that go on im my life.
We hosted Thanksgiving for ourselves and a few friends today. everything went extremely well. There was touch of stress (being slightly hungover from cheap tap beer and having only had a few hours of sleep prior didn't help matters), but I was generally really pleased with it all. Especially the god damned mythical beast, the traditional Thanksgiving turkey.
As most of you know, I attended and received my Associates degree from The Culinary Institute of America. That not withstanding, I have always approached the roasting of the turkey to be exactly in line with that of roasting a chicken. In reality, it the same thing, just on a much larger scale. The thing that can mess with a fuckers mind is ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL the bullshit, wives tales, internet bullshit, individual interpretation and overall KOONT about the "correct" method to cook the bird. I have to admit, I've only actually had ONE opportunity to 'do' a Thanksgiving turkey, and that was while I was still in the throes of culinary school. My family, god bless them, has never even entertained the thought of their only fucking college gradute to prepare a holiday dinner.... for gosh hecks sake, why would they? (more on that later).
So, as the hour was approaching, I pulled the turkey (which we had pulled from the freezer three god damned days before, and it was STILL icy! FUCKER!!) out of the fridge. I was pulling it out of it's packaging, and on the back it had the "proper preperation" method. Now, according to Jennie-O, that whore of a woman, one is to cook this god forsaken animal 20 minutes per pound! Okay, so a little simple math: our turkey (20#) X 20 minutes = 400 minutes / 60 minutes =6.66 hours. 7 HOURS?!?! Okay, I'm all for not killing folks with food bourne illnesses, but seven fucking hours? no wonder all you idiots have been eating sawdust turkey jerkey all these years! I would've had to put that turkey in at bar time for christs sake!
I chose to go with my insticts and education... about 3.25 hours later, that turkey was bueno. The moral of the story? Don't believe everything you read, and equally important, wives tales are bullshit!
Happy holidays... talk to you soon!
-d2
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